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写在前面

这篇翻译爆炸了,五个句子都没完整翻译出来。前面两篇虽然也很难吧,但是也不至于说翻译不了。

前前后后磨了一个小时,真是心累。

气死我了,翻译的一点都不通顺,甚至都提不上通顺

回顾一下为啥呢?

其实最关键的还是词义不理解,分两点,首先是认识的词不知道在文中的含义,其次是不认识的词。

此外还有句子结构分不清,我曾经自认为大多数句子成分的划分我已完全没问题,但是今天的这篇翻译告诉还需要继续努力。

比如these gardens speak of various other fundamental urges,这个看死我了都不知道成分怎么拆

看看咋回事吧

题目

第一句

yet when one looks at the photographs of the gardens created by the homeless, it strikes one that, for all their diversity of styles, these gardens speak of various other fundamental urges, beyond that of decoration and creative expression.

yet when one looks at the photographs of the gardens created by the homeless:从句

it strikes one that 主句

for all their diversity of styles 一个短语

these gardens speak of various other fundamental urges 主句中嵌套了从句

beyond that of decoration and creative expression 从句后接了一个介词短语

++yet when one looks at the photographs of the gardens created by the homeless++

翻译:然而,当我们看到那些由无家可归者创造的花园的照片时

==词义==:

  • yet conj. 但是;然而
  • one 泛指,“人们”、“我们”、“一个人”
  • the homeless 无家可归的人
  • the +adj. → 名词
    • the poor 穷人
    • the rich 富人
    • the elderly 老年人
    • the disabled 残疾人

++语法提示++

  • 被动结构: 核心原则:尽量不用“被”

    1. 用其他词替换“被”:遭到;受到;为…所;是由…的;得以

    2. 固定搭配

    3. 被动变主动,可根据语境补充主语

    4. 有被不用被

==用语适配==

调整语序:定语前置(分词短语+of 结构)

++it strikes one that, for all their diversity of styles++

翻译:我们会突然意识到,尽管它们风格多样

这里的for是啥啊

==词义==

  • strike /straɪk/ v. 碰撞,撞击
  • it strikes sb. that 某人突然想到;猛地意识到(类似于我们被什么撞了一下)
  • strike sb as sth 让(某人)觉得;给(某人以…)印象
  • for all 尽管;虽然(despite)(这里就相当于是一个介词短语)
  • diversity /daɪˈvɜ:səti/ / n. 多样性;差异
    • diverse /daɪˈvɜ:s/ adj. 多种多样的;不同的

==翻译要点==

  1. it strikes one that: 我们会突然意识到

  2. of 结构:their diversity of styles

​ 直译:它们风格的多样性

​ 调整:它们风格多样

这里也是静态语言动态语言之分,英文爱用名词,中文爱用动词

++these gardens speak of various other fundamental urges++

翻译:这些花园体现了各种其他的根本欲望

==词义==

  • speak of 表明;说明;体现(to be evidence that sth exists or is present)

  • fundamental /ˌfʌndəˈmentl/ adj. 根本的;基本的;基础的

  • urge /ɜ:dʒ/ n. (强烈的) 欲望;冲动

真是怪了,这里的various为啥能放在other前面呢

urge我还以为是敦促,那敦促是什么呢

++beyond that of decoration and creative expression.++

翻译:除了装饰和创造性表达的欲望之外

==词义==

  • beyond prep. 超出;除…之外
  • decoration /ˌdekəˈreɪʃn/ n. 装饰;装饰品
    • decorate /ˈdekəreɪt/ v. 装饰

这里我把beyond翻译成超过了

==翻译要点==

代词 that:指明要点–urge

of 结构:A of B and C→B和C 的A

++重组++

  1. 2、3重组时需注意++中文关联词成对出现++:尽管…但是…

  2. 中英语序差异:

    英文:主语+重要信息+修饰解释(中心信息前置)

    中文:主语+修饰解释+重要信息(自然因果顺序)

所以在 ③④重组时

直译为:这些花园体现了各种其他的根本欲望,除了装饰和创造性表达的欲望之外

++调整为符合中文语序++: 把除了往前放

​ 调整 1:这些花园除了装饰和创造性表达的欲望之外,还体现了各种其他的根本欲望

++增加动词++:体现/表达

​ 调整 2:这些花园除了表达装饰和创造性表达的欲望之外,还体现了各种其他的根本欲望。

	He wears a coat, a hat and a scarf. 他穿着一件上衣,戴着一顶帽子,系着一个围脖。 

++增加对象词++:人类

​ 调整 3:这些花园除了表达(人类)装饰和创造性表达的欲望之外,还体现了(人类)各种其他的根本欲望。

然而,当我们看到那些由无家可归者创造的花园的照片时,我们会突然意识到,尽管它们风格多样但是这些花园**除了表达(人类)装饰和创造性表达的欲望之外,体现了(人类)**各种 其他的根本欲望。


第二句

A sacred place of peace, however crude it may be, is a distinctly human need, as opposed to shelter, which is a distinctly animal need.

++A sacred place of peace++

翻译:一个神圣的宁静之所

==词义==

  • sacred /ˈseɪkrɪd/ adj. 神圣的;宗教的;受崇敬的

==翻译要点==:

  • 调整语序:定语前置

  • peace /piːs/ n. 和平;平静,安静,宁静 (在这个题里,和这个文章的意思不符合了)

++however crude it may be++

翻译:无论它多么简陋

==翻译要点==:

however = no matter how (与adj.或 adv.连用)无论多么;无论如何

crude /kruːd/ adj. 粗糙的;粗制的;天然的;未加工的 (这里不能写未加工,需要根据文意来调整,改为简陋)

代词 it:它

++is a distinctly human need++

翻译:明显是人类的需求

==生难词==:

  • distinctly /dɪˈstɪŋktli/ adv. 明显地;清楚地
    • distinct adj. 明显的;清晰的;确实的

++as opposed to shelter, which is a distinctly animal need.++

前置:与明显是动物需求的庇护所不同

后置:与庇护所不同,庇护所明显是动物需求✅(这个更好一些)

调整:与庇护所不同,后者明显是动物需求

==生难词==:

  • as opposed to (表示对比)而,相对于 (= rather than)(这里翻译为与…不同
    • used to make a contrast between two things【Oxford】

shelter /ˈʃeltə(r)/ n. (尤指用以躲避风雨或攻击的)遮蔽物;避难处;庇护所

重组

这方面没啥需要大改的,就是在is a distinctly前面加一个代词这,让句意更通顺


第三句

The gardens of the homeless, which are in effect homeless gardens, introduce form into an urban environment where it either didn’t exist or was not discernible as such.

which引导的定语从句和where引导的定语从句

翻译:无家可归者的花园实际上也是无家之园,它们把“形式”引入城市环境,在城市环境中,要么

不存在这种“形式”,要么不把它识别为真的“形式”。

The gardens of the homeless

无家可归者的花园

which are in effect homeless gardens

==词义==

  • in effect 是 实际上事实上的意思

==要点==

这里的homeless gardens直译为“无家可归”的花园,但是不通顺

调整为无家之园

这个地方可以将一二句重组

introduce form into an urban environment

form是一个斜体,可能表示强调或者别的含义,需要加双引号

introduce 的主题是无家可归者的花园

需要补充一个代词来指代前面的主语(它们)

这里的introduce… into… 意思为将…引入为…带来,而不是直接理解成介绍

很遗憾本人就是直接当介绍来理解了,居然忘记introduce还有引入的含义

where it either didn’t exist or was not discernible as such

这里主要还是词义的问题:

  • either… or… 是要么…要么…的意思
    • neither··· nor···是既不···也不···

在这里我翻译成既…也….了

  • discernible 可辨别的;可识别的(我不知道是啥意思)
    • discern v. 识别;辨别
  • as such 准确意义上;严格来说(与否定词连用)

where修饰environment,相当于in environment

it指的是前面的form

discernible直接翻译很奇怪,所以换成 be discerned。

直译:在城市环境中,这种“形式”要么不存在,要么不被识别为真的“形式”

这里的被动需要调整一下,不被…就像相当于不把它…

这里前面也需要改成动词,改为不存在这种形式

调整:++在城市环境中,要么不存在这种“形式”,要么不把它识别为真的“形式”++

重组

无家可归者的花园实际上也是无家之园,它们把“形式”引入城市环境,在城市环境中,要么

不存在这种“形式”,要么不把它识别为真的“形式”。


第四句

most of us give in to a demoralization of spirit which we usually blame on some psychological conditions, until one day we find ourselves in a garden and feel the oppression vanish as if by magic.

拆分方面:

most of us give in to a demoralization of spirit主谓宾,句子主干

which we usually blame on some psychological conditions定从

until one day we find ourselves in a garden 时间状语从句

feel the oppression vanish as if by magic

most of us give in to a demoralization of spirit

直译:我们大多数人会屈服于精神的意志消沉

调整:我们大多数人都会陷入一种精神萎靡的状态

  • give in(to sb/sth)屈服、让步、头像

  • demoralization n. 意志消沉;士气低落;推搡

    • demoralize v. 使意志消沉

==翻译要点==

give in (to sb/sth):屈服于→陷入

of 结构:a demoralization of spirit

直译:精神的意志消沉

调整 1:精神萎靡(名词转译为动词)

调整 2:精神萎靡的状态(增加范畴词)

增加范畴词:(英译汉)

范畴词,汉语特有的表达习惯,没有实际意义,用于归类或概括某一属性、状态或行为,使抽象概念具象化。英语原文无对应词,但中文需补充才能符合表达习惯。水平,方式,方法,情况,问题,方面

which we usually blame on some psychological conditions

  • blame A on B 把A 归咎于 B

​ Police are blaming the accident on dangerous driving.【Oxford

  • blame B for A 把A 归咎于 B(因为 A 责怪B)

​ She doesn’t blame anyone for the accident. 【Oxford

  • psychological /ˌsaɪkəˈlɒdʒɪkl/ adj. 心理的;心理学的

    • psychology n. 心理学
    • psychologist n. 心理学家
  • condition n. 条件;状况(2018 年完型)

    1. 状态,状况 in bad/good condition 处于糟糕的/良好的状态
    2. (居住、工作)环境,条件 under … conditions 在…条件/环境下
    3. (先决)条件 a necessary condition for …的必要条件
    4. 疾病 a heart condition 心脏病

这里是blame~on,中间加一个代词其(翻译对了✅)

until one day we find ourselves in a garden

翻译:直到有一天,我们发现自己身处花园

and feel the oppression vanish as if by magic

直译:感到那种压抑神奇地消失了

调整:才感到那种压抑感神奇地消失了

as if by magic 神奇地;奇迹般地。当作固定搭配来记

by magic是状语,修饰vanish的,需要前置

前面and 是 feel和find的并列,这个地方有一个隐形的因果逻辑,翻译为才

oppression,可以翻译成压抑

vanish v. 消失;突然不见

重组

我们大多数人都会陷入一种精神萎靡状态, 我们通常将归咎于某些心理疾病,直到有一天,我们发现自己身处花园,感到那种压抑神奇地消失了。


第五句

It is this implicit or explicit reference to nature that fully justifies the use of word garden,though in a “liberated” sense, to describe these synthetic constructions.

It is this implicit or explicit reference to nature that fully justifies the use of word garden

翻译:正是这种或含蓄或明确的对自然的参照,充分证明了使用“花园”一词是合理的

这是一个强调结构it is + 强调部分 + that,去掉强调结构,句子仍然完整

  • implicit /ɪmˈplɪsɪt/ adj. 含蓄的;暗示的

  • explicit /ɪkˈsplɪsɪt/ adj. 明确的;直言不讳的

  • reference /ˈrefrəns/ n. 提及;谈及;参考,参照

  • justify /ˈdʒʌstɪfaɪ/ v. 证明…正当;为…辩护;对…作出解释

    • justification /ˌdʒʌstɪfɪˈkeɪʃn/ n. 正当理由;辩护

==翻译要点==

  • 强调结构:

    1. 辨别方法:it is +强调部分+ that,去掉强调结构,句子仍然完整

    2. 翻译方法:强调部分加上“正如,正是,就是,恰恰是等”

  • reference 词义确定:参照/指涉

  • of 结构:the use of word garden→use 转译为动词

though in a “liberated” sense

  • 直译:尽管是在一种“不受束缚的”的意义上

  • 调整:

    1. 尽管是一种“宽泛”意义上的花园
    2. 尽管是“广义”的花园
    3. 尽管得稍稍“解放”花园这个词的语义

==生难词==

  • liberated /ˈlɪbəreɪtɪd/ adj. 解放的;不受束缚的

    • liberate /ˈlɪbəˌreɪt/ v. 解放;使自由

    • liberty /ˈlɪbətɪ/ n. 自由

  • in a … sense 从…角度;在…意义上

==要点==

这里的liberated应该怎么翻译,自由或者不受束缚似乎都不太对

原译本把这个翻译为“解放”,打了英豪

to describe these synthetic constructions

翻译:来描述这些人造建造物

==生难词:==

synthetic /sɪnˈθetɪk/ adj. 人造的;(人工)合成的

construction /kənˈstrʌkʃ(ə)n/ n. 建筑;建造物

这里的construction不能翻作建筑,可以翻译为建造物

重组

尽管是一种“宽泛”意义上的花园,但正是这种或含蓄或明确的对自然的参照,充分证明了使用“花园”一词来描述这些人造建造物是合理的。

==要点==:

  • 插入语的译法:

    1. 提到句首
    2. 保留原文位置,用破折号连接
  • 中文关联词成对出现:尽管…但是…

  • ① ③重组:语序调整

原文

It is speculated that gardens arise from a basic need in the individuals who made them: the need for creative expression. There is no doubt that gardens evidence an impossible urge to create, express, fashion, and beautify and that self-expression is a basic human urge; (46) ++Yet when one looks at the photographs of the garden created by the homeless, it strikes one that , for all their diversity of styles, these gardens speak of various other fundamental urges, beyond that of decoration and creative expression++.

One of these urges had to do with creating a state of peace in the midst of turbulence, a “still point of the turning world,” to borrow a phrase from T. S. Eliot. (47)++A sacred place of peace, however crude it may be, is a distinctly human need, as opposed to shelter, which is a distinctly animal need++. This distinction is so much so that where the latter is lacking, as it is for these unlikely gardens, the former becomes all the more urgent. Composure is a state of mind made possible by the structuring of one’s relation to one’s environment. (48)++The gardens of the homeless which are in effect homeless gardens introduce from into an urban environment where it either didn’t exist or was not discernible as such++. In so doing they give composure to a segment of the inarticulate environment in which they take their stand.

Another urge or need that these gardens appear to respond to, or to arise from is so intrinsic that we are barely ever conscious of its abiding claims on us. When we are deprived of green, of plants, of trees, (49) ++most of us give into a demoralization of spirit which we usually blame on some psychological conditions, until one day we find ourselves in garden and feel the expression vanish as if by magic++. In most of the homeless gardens of New York City the actual cultivation of plants is unfeasible, yet even so the compositions often seem to represent attempts to call arrangement of materials, an institution of colors, small pool of water, and a frequent presence of petals or leaves as well as of stuffed animals. On display here are various fantasy elements whose reference, at some basic level, seems to be the natural world. (50)++It is this implicit or explicit reference to nature that fully justifies the use of word garden though in a “liberated” sense, to describe these synthetic constructions++. In them we can see basophilic- a yearning for contact with nonhuman life-assuming uncanny representational forms.